


safe

by beatboxbmo



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Comfort, Fluff, Friendship, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Other, Out of Character, Platonic Cuddling, but idgaf, claustrophobic ushijima, sorta - Freeform, tho it doesn't play a big part
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-10
Updated: 2016-12-10
Packaged: 2018-09-07 14:54:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8805229
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/beatboxbmo/pseuds/beatboxbmo
Summary: "I'm sorry," Ushijima's voice cracks. Hajime immediately starts shaking his head. He wasn't prepared for this. His mouth goes dry, his mind whirling with thoughts on how he's going to be able to help his friend. "I didn't know where else to go."





	

When the call comes at three in the morning, the only thing Hajime can think to say is:

“Please don’t tell me you got arrested again.”

There's a huff of laughter, and he imagines the other shaking his head.

"No, I did not get arrested."

"Then why are you calling me? It's too fuckin' early."

A sigh, and his follow-up is almost clipped, like he's holding back. "I'm sorry I woke you."

Hajime waits for Ushijima to say more, to add on. When the silence continues to stretch and he can feel himself slipping back into unconsciousness, he manages, "What happened?" he rolls onto his back and thinks about forcing himself into a sitting position, but even just thinking about the amount of effort it would take exhausts him further.

"I... I had a bad dream."

He can't help the spurt of laughter that escapes. "Seriously?"

There's a shaky inhale, and it leads into deafening silence, making Hajime realize he fucked up. Despite Ushijima's appearance, he's highly sensitive and doesn't like being laughed at, even in a teasing manner. Hajime can't count how many times he's had to apologize for his own unchecked behavior.

He sobers, sleep being pushed back as he props himself up. He apologizes quietly into the receiver and wipes at his face, rubbing away the last of sleep.

"What do you need?"

Ushijima doesn't reply right away. Hajime almost wonders if he's been hung up on, but it's then that he recognizes the sound of people in the background. And is that--? _Is he on the fucking train? At this hour?_

Now he's _really_ awake. Ushijima hates taking the trains. Even though they're hardly full at this time, the eeriness of them in the early hours unsettles even Hajime. The movement is usually what gets to Ushijima though, and the packed-in people. Hajime's always found it interesting how a huge guy like Ushijima can be so claustrophobic.

Ushijima speaks slowly, like what he says might upset Hajime. As if. "I might be on my way to your apartment. I... I couldn't stay home any more. I couldn't-I couldn't--"

"Hey, it's alright, I understand," he says, his voice light and hopefully cheery. The high pitched whine to Ushijima's voice is concerning. "I'll go unlock the door now, so when you get here you can just let yourself in, alright?"

A muffled sound greets him. "Thank you."

"Want me to stay on the line until you get here?"

"That--" an inhale, "that won't be necessary. We are arriving at the station now. I will be there shortly."

"Alright. Call again if you need to."

"Mm." Hajime doesn't like it when they hang up.

_It's too early for this shit._

Guilt spikes through his chest at the thought. This isn't something Ushijima can control, something he shouldn't have to apologize for. If Hajime is being honest with himself, he loves the fact that Ushijima trusts him so much. He never thought it'd happen, considering their past, but the other man is now one of his closest friends. He'd do anything for the guy.

He doesn't know if the nightmares are always the same, of if they change, or if he even remembers them. For Hajime, the dreams themselves never remain, but the feelings linger after he wakes. It takes him ages to understand why he feels terrified or empty or lonely. Hazy images of his dreams will drift by, but ultimately, he never fully remembers. There's no telling what Ushijima goes through when he dreams.

By the time his front door opens, he's pulled a hoodie and pants on, has made two cups of cocoa, and has claimed a chair in the kitchen as his new bed as he waits. Ushijima clears his throat to get Hajime's attention, and he jumps at the sound.

When he spots the other man, his heart drops.

His eyes are red-rimmed, his hair is tangled and strewn about, his clothes--his _pajamas_ \--are rumbled and out of place. The leather jacket thrown over can't enough to keep him warm from the chilly autumn morning, not enough over his thin cotton shirt and sweats. Hajime immediately jumps up and heads for the living room, grabbing the fleece blanket off the couch and wrapping it around Ushijima's shoulders. He flinches at the contact, and Hajime makes sure to step away quickly, wondering if maybe the train ride has kicked up his nerves.

"I'm sorry," Ushijima's voice cracks. Hajime immediately starts shaking his head. He wasn't prepared for this. His mouth goes dry, his mind whirling with thoughts on how he's going to be able to help his friend. "I didn't know where else to go."

Hajime lifts an arm and points towards the living room, hoping Ushijima will get the hint. "You're always welcome here man, you know that." Ushijima just nods stiffly, but he turns and heads for the couch, securing the blanket more firmly over his shoulders. Hajime grabs a cup of cocoa and follows him, placing it on the coffee table in front of Ushijima before taking a seat on the floor on the other side of the table. Close enough that Ushijima knows he's here, but hopefully not close enough that he feels confined.

Ushijima takes the cocoa, sips at it quietly. Hajime doesn't think he's seen Ushijima look so terrible before. He doesn't know if he should ask about it either.

The silence stretches between them, and just when Hajime starts to feel sleepy again, Ushijima's deep voice sweeps across the space between them, a crack at the end reminiscent of thunder.

"Why are we friends?"

Hajime doesn't have time to think before the words are out: "Because you're cool."

There's a flinch around Ushijima's eyes, and Hajime continues, the words tumbling out, "You're kind; in your own way you're hilarious and never fail to make me smile; you're compassionate and passionate; you're an amazing cook and please never stop bring over your extra food, I would die without it." he cracks a smile, hoping to get a reaction from Ushijima, maybe get him to smile a little too.

Instead, his lips waver, and his eyes squeeze shut.

 _Shit shit shit shit_.

Ushijima doesn't cry though. Something in Hajime figures Ushijima might've cried enough tonight.

"You're a great listener," Hajime continues. He doesn't really know if what he's saying is going to help any, but he wants Ushijima to know this, "and after all that shit that happened this past summer with those assholes, you were someone I found myself leaning on more than ever. You're someone I would trust with my _life_ and nothin's gonna change that. You never turn your back on someone, never fail to help those around you. You're almost too caring for your own good, but that's just one of the things that makes you so amazing."

It takes a moment for Ushijima's lips to stop quivering long enough for him to mutter a small "Thank you" before his hands move the mug to the table and cover his face, blocking himself from Hajime as his shoulders start to shake and sobs fill the apartment.

Prickles run down his neck, unsure of what to do. He doesn't like seeing his friend like this, doesn't know what caused it and isn't sure he even wants to know. But he can't just sit here and watch.

He crawls around the table until his back is pressed against the couch. He moves until his head is resting on Ushijima's knee, body angled so he's touching as little of Ushijima as possible, but still making sure his presence is known. He doesn't say anything, just lets Ushijima cry it out.

Does this change anything between them? Ushijima has always been a sensitive person, but he's never really showed his emotions, especially extreme ones like this. Maybe it speaks of the trust between them, the comfort they share. Hajime would be lying if he said he didn't wish there was more to their friendship, but he's also content with where they're at. Maybe Ushijima isn't though? Is it possible that Ushijima would want more? Or does he feel pressured and would rather distance himself from their friendship then continue forwards?

Hajime groans at the thought, not liking the idea of losing Ushijima. He might fight it, might try to keep Ushijima close, but if it's what Ushijima really wanted, then there's nothing he can do. He's not going to cause his friend further unhappiness.

"Can-can I ask for one more thing?"

Ushijima's voice crackles from above Hajime. He lifts his head, only to see that Ushijima's face is still buried in his hands.

"Of course," he whispers. He's so close he could probably feel Ushijima's breath on his face if his hands weren't in the way.

"Can I hug you?"

Hajime leans back involuntarily, the question so unexpected he doesn't know what to feel for a moment. Ushijima must take the silence as rejection, because he starts to curl in on himself and pull away from Hajime. But Hajime won't have any of that.

He pulls himself up onto the couch and opens his arms wide, already wrapping them around Ushijima's large frame before the other can react. He hopes this is okay, hopes Ushijima won't feel confined or restricted. He doesn't need to be causing his friend stress.

Almost immediately though, Ushijima relaxes against him. His hands lower until he's gripping the front of Hajime's hoodie, his face pressed against his shoulder, and his weight is leaning almost fully on Hajime, until he has to lay back against the couch cushions to support the both of them.

He doesn't mind it though. He tightens his arms around Ushijima, one hand rubbing a spot on Ushijima's back through the blanket, the other smoothing his hair away from his face. Suddenly, he wants to kiss Ushijima. He wants to pepper the other man's face in soft kisses and touches and tell him nice things, to lift his mood until he's his old self again. He wants Ushijima to smile again.

They settle together until Hajime is reclining fully, with Ushijima spread out over him, his face still hidden and hands still clenching Hajime's hoodie. He doesn't mind the fact that his friend weighs a ton and it's a little hard to breathe. He's warm, and he actually really loves holding his friend like this. It's almost like a little power trip to hold such a big guy.

When Ushijima's breathing has evened and his hands loosen their grip, Hajime takes that as his cue to ask, "Feeling better?"

There's no answer.

When he tilts his head down to get a better look at Ushijima's face, a laugh rumbles out of him.

Ushijima's asleep.

The peaceful expression on his face is such a relief to Hajime that he chuckles again. Without thinking too much about it, he kisses Ushijima's forehead, then tightens his grip around him. Ushijima's weight on top of him isn't exactly comfortable, but there's no fucking way he's waking the other man. He wiggles until their legs aren't tangled anymore, until Hajime can rest his head more comfortably against the cushions. 

He'll have one helluva kink in his neck in the morning. Probably won't be able to feel _anything_ when he wakes up. But right now, he could care less. His friend is sleeping peacefully and that's all that matters to Hajime. His grip tightens once more, and he can't resist the urge to place another soft kiss against the top of Ushijima's head. When they wake up, Hajime will make sure Ushijima knows how cared for he is, how much Hajime loves him. He deserves the best, and he'll do anything to make sure his friend knows that.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this in one night bc after that s3 finale I just needed something with ushi and hugs like holY SHIT that one face he made 3 having iwa be the hugger tho was a surprise to myself but I don't regret. this poor quality writing I do regret tho, but hopefully it's not too bad.
> 
> anyways. ushiiwa friendship (or relationships) should be more of a thing. just sayin.
> 
>  
> 
> [tumblr](http://ushijimaenthusiast.tumblr.com/)


End file.
